Wednesday, March 28, 2007

This is really sad. We lived in Tucson from 3/2003 - 10/2004 and saw the fires that devastated the top of Mt. Lemmon. It is a truly beautiful place up there. If we had stayed in AZ we had thought to buy land up there. It is so much cooler; beautiful and peaceful.

I am sad that it may be dying away.

(Picture by Rick Scibelli Jr. for The New York Times)

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Alone vs. Lonely

Soper posted the other day how she is lonely in the new town that she, D and Moonpie are now living. She has been there one year and has made exactly zero friends. And she is lonely.

That could have been me writing that post. We have been here in Florida for just over one year and I have no friends. I don't even have nodding acquaintances.

I tried to get involved with the mom's group in the development that we live in but most of those women are stay-at-home moms (and 15 years younger...thanks IF), so I don't really fit in. They did do activities in the evenings but I usually wanted to stay home with E and/or worked too late to participate.

I work in a mostly male-dominated field and so have little in common with most of the people I work with.

But I don't know if I would call myself 'lonely.' I have always been comfortable being alone. I like my house. I like coming home and doing stuff at home. I like spending the weekends in my craftroom or puttering around in the garden. I like taking E to the beach or the zoo or to just about anything.

Most of all I like me and can easily spend the whole day, if necessary, with just me.

Sometimes, though, I would like a friend that I can go to lunch with or maybe spend a day just goofing off. I miss Sandy and Kathy and Mari (now that she's a grown-up woman and all). I would like to be able to spend a day at a spa with a friend. Or just sit over coffee and BS with.

But, lonely? No. Probably not.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007


We fired our lawyer. She was really not very effective; she did not return phone calls; she didn't object to the introduction of the Guardian ad litem report; she only filed our Motion to Dismiss (futile tho' it may have been) until I mentioned it (something that is the very first thing I understand an attorney should have done).

So we are lawyer shopping. Not as easy a task as you might imagine. It is not like buying shoes or groceries. There are no Lawyer Stores that you can go in and browse.

"Oh, yes, I would like to try on that bright-eyed one in the corner. Harvard...very impressive... Oh you have a University of Florida model on sale this week? Great! I'd like to take that one around the block if I may!"

No! No! You have to make an appointment ("Oh, we have an opening in March...oh, no, that is March 2010, you ignorant slut..."), and, despite what my well-meaning though not very lawyer-savvy FIL may say, pay them some enormous sum of money that is equal to the GNP of several small Central American countries just to talk to them (no, they don't offer the first visit for free...take a look and see how many offer a free initial consultation...go ahead, I dare you...). Yes. You have to hire them so you can decide if you want to hire them.

And should we get a Family attorney or a litigator? We don't want some schmuck that will just roll over and do whatever DCF wants them to do. We could have done that ourself...that is what DCF wants you to do, expects you to do. That is what most people do. They are counting on you being so scared and desparate to have your children back that you will do anything they want.

But we didn't do anything wrong.

And I want someone who will stand up and say that.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Miracles happen...

Jesus fucking Christ!!!

Tertia is pregnant!!!

Friday, March 09, 2007

Other things

I do have an interest (and can write about) things other than the crap that my life has been recently. As I mentioned once before, I like to do handicrafts...sewing, knitting, crocheting, needlework, etc. Lately I have been into cross stitching.

I was first introduced to cross stitching quite a few years ago from a colleague who said she enjoyed it. So I went out and bought a cross stitch of the stamped ones wherein the pattern is stamped on the cloth and you merely follow the lines and stitch where ever there is a mark on the cloth. So I bought one.

And never finished it. Then I bought another. And didn't finish that either.

So I left cross stitching alone for quite a while.

About 10 years later, B's brothers started having children...and I wanted to make those cross stitched birth announcements. So I bought another kit only this time it was counted cross stitching (god this is boring). The difference being that in counted cross stitch you start out with a blank canvas and count the stitches (get it? Counted. Cross. Stitch).

And I finished it. And then I finished another. Hey! I can do this!

As boring as that may sound, I find it very relaxing and quite engrossing. I have stayed up very late because I just want to finish This One Section.

One of the things that I finished lately is this picture that I am going to hang in E's room (once it gets properly washed and framed). It is from the book Guess How Much I Love You. I know that some people don't like this book (i.e. "...why would a father try to 'one-up' his child?"). To those people I say, phlbbbbttt (*wipe drool from chin*). I think it is a sweet book that speaks of a parent's boundless love for a child.

And I finished this piece this past weekend. I actually started this about 5 years ago. I got it about half done and then it got put aside and then we moved and I couldn't find it for quite some time. I found it when I was unpacking all of my craft stuff. This is one of the bigger and more complex things that I have done. It has a lot of colors and a lot of outlining; I still need to add some beads to it, but I think I will wash it and iron it first. It is a bell pull so I also have to find some hardware to put at the top and the bottom. I think a trip to the craft store is in the offing...

The next thing I am going to work on is this Christmas stocking. I actually bought this last October hopefully to finish before the holiday, but only got this far when my interest was highjacked by staring at legal documents and trying to understand how the f$#% someone's life can get tweaked out of control so quickly.

It will be ready for next Christmas.