Happy Birthday, my beautiful boy

Seven years ago, I was in the hospital, but I was happy.

Happy birthday,my son.

Happy Birthday, Beautiful Boy from itsjustme on Vimeo.

Thanksgiving Day Gorge Fest

Okay, everyone is posting about their Thanksgiving dinner plans. So, just to help me get organized I will outline my T-day menu too.

1) We will start out the day with a breakfast of my Easy-Peasy Cinnamon Rolls because I like them and if anyone else doesn’t, they can kiss my lily-white…

2) Turkey – well, turkey breast. B went to the store to redeem our free turkey (grocery store-speak for ‘thanks for buying so much crap at our store…here’s your ten dollar turkey, sucker!’) and came home with a turkey BREAST (must have been mesmerized by the word ‘breast’). No problem for me…I just eat the white meat anyway, but B will have no drumsticks. I am trying a dry-brine this year. I have done the wet brine and it is really good but I thought I would try it another way this year.

3) Mashed potatoes – Pioneer Woman’s creamy mashed potatoes. God they are good. Bonus, they can be made a day in advance. Win-win.

4) Sausage-cornbread Dressing – I like it this way and if anyone complains, well then there is more for me.

5) Gravy – I make kick-ass gravy. Pour gravy over the stuffing, the mashed potatoes, a piece of bread, spilled it on my shoe. God it’s good.

6) Homemade dinner rolls – again PW’s No-Knead Rolls – they look really easy and, again, make in advance…

7) Glorified rice – a modification of my MIL’s recipe – it has cream cheese, maraschino cherries, pineapple and whipped cream – what’s not to like?

8) Pumpkin pie – okay, this is kinda boring but I will make the boring kind of pumpkin pie that B likes instead of my kick-ass pumpkin chiffon pie…obviously my family ain’t here.

9) Pumpkin Leche Flan – it’s flan…that’s all I needed to hear…

10) B’s family's creamed corn crap – obviously not a favorite of mine.

11) That ghastly green bean casserole – see #10.

12) Broccoli-Cauliflower Gratin – it’s cauliflower…and CHEESE…sounds good to me.

And, of course, wine...delicious, delicious wine.

There…you think that’s enough food for three people (the smallest of whom will probably pick and complain, eat the mashed potatoes and gravy and say that he doesn't like turkey...)?

Happy Thanksgiving and Bon Appetit!

The Magician

I did not post much about what we did this past Halloween. We had a pretty busy day, though. We started out at O'Dark thirty with a hockey game. Then we went to a local library which had a magician performing. E volunteered and I got this tasty video:

E and the Magician from itsjustme on Vimeo.

We ended the day Trick-or-Treating with one of my co-workers and her grandson in their neighborhood. The day was (only slightly) marred by the downpour that occurred (fortunately) at the end of our Trick-or-Treating outing. We went back to Ginny's house and E & D played downstairs while our clothes dried in the dryer and she & I sipped hot coffee and chatted. A pretty good day.

Too Close

My god...this made shivers go up and down my spine. This is just a few miles from our house in Orange Park, FL. Evan rode his bike to and from school. My hands are shaking.

My heart goes out to this little girl's mother.

Animals Attack

Racoons and Tigers and Bears, oh my!

Really??

You know, I like our President. I think he is a good man and will try his best to make a better world, but the Nobel Peace Prize? Really? Now? For what?

Other sitting presidents have gotten it but they actually did something. TR brokered peace between Russia and Japan. Wilson worked on ending WWI and created the League of Nations. Carter got one after leaving office for “decades of work seeking peaceful solutions and promoting social and economic justice”.

I guess they are giving Obama a Nobel in hopes that he will do something.

Okay. Someone give me $2 million in hopes that I will win the lottery.

Greatest Gift

Don't have much to say today, but I want to post this because I love this song. This is another one that I wind up blubbering through. Enjoy.

Second Grade

E was tested today by a private school and is being accepted into second grade. I am kind of two minds about it. He was clearly not being challenged at all in first grade. I am just amazed at how easy the work has been so far. I can understand maybe taking a couple of days in the first week to go over things they may have forgotten from the year previous but we are a month in and I would have thought that everything they are doing was learned in kindergarten (or preschool). How much review are they going to do?

"Nat sat on the mat.
The cat sat on the mat.
Nat sat on the mat with the cat."

That’s first grade work? Adding together numbers less than ten? I look at the reading list for first grade and these books are all too easy for him. He is adding and subtracting, carrying and borrowing. He is learning his multiplication tables and is beginning division (I work with him a lot on math). We read a lot of books together. He has shown great interest in books on science and geography. I want him to be excited about school and learning. Right now he is not learning anything at school. And looking at the curriculum I don’t think he would learn much in first grade at all.

But it is a great social place. He makes friends easily and gets along with everyone. I hate that this will be the third school he will attend this year. He will be younger than everyone in second grade. He won’t turn seven until December.

He is still young and will adjust. I worry about kids teasing him because he is younger than they are. It is good that he is tall and looks older than he is. He is so tall. He already looks like a second or third grader (or fourth grader). Maybe he won’t be the tallest kid in class anymore.

I’m sure it will all turn out. But I will worry.

That is what mothers are for.

Myths and Distractions

So, my son lost another tooth yesterday. His top four front teeth have been wiggling for months but one of them was wigglier (is that a word?). He has been sitting and playing with it now for over a month and yesterday at school it finally decided to take the leap and came out in his hand. His teacher, the sainted woman, had a little ‘tooth box’ just big enough for him to carry it home in.

Naturally the trip home consisted of talk of the Tooth Fairy.

“What will she bring me, mommy?”

“I don’t know, sweetie. We will have to wait and see.”

We got home and I took a picture of the hole left by his errant tooth. He called his grandpa and told him, “Mommy took a picture to send to you. Give it to grandma to make her smile” (bad mommy – it is still in the camera).

And sporadically throughout the evening he speculated on what the Tooth Fairy would bring him.

Bedtime (blessed bedtime) and bad mommy watched a movie and forgot about the tooth fairy.

*early this morning* “Why didn’t the tooth fairy come, mommy?”

*still asleep* “Unngghhh…” - crap – stupid tooth fairy, “I think she was real busy last night, sweetheart.”

Memo – keep small, cheap pieces of crap around house feed tooth fairy myth. Bitch.

Oh, Those Awards Shows

I don’t watch awards shows. The Emmys, Oscars, Grammys, Tonys, whatever. A bunch of the so-called rich and famous patting themselves on the back just makes me want to puke. And there are so many of them. Sheesh, every time I turn around there is another stupid awards show: Golden Globes, People’s Choice, SAG awards, Latin awards, NAACP awards, Dogs Chasing Stagecoach awards, Blonde Receptionist awards, ad nauseum.

Maybe one reason I just can’t get into these things is that I so seldom see the shows that are nominated. Until I took my son to the new Star Trek movie this summer I hadn’t been to a movie since before he was born (he turns 7 in two months, people – thank god for Netflix). Right now we don’t even have a working TV. We have so far not opted to connect the cable and our TV is so old (and we never got a converter box) that it can’t pick up the HDTV signals. Fred Flintstone has better electronics than we do.

I do read the recaps, don’t ask me why, I don’t know. And I need to see the fashions that are worn. Some of the dresses are nice, some are what-the-fuck-was-she-thinking. Then I notice the actresses. And realize what most of them need is a sandwich, not a statue. I don’t know who this woman is or what show she is on but I just want to dangle a brownie in front of her face and watch her gag. Good god, she is so skinny I can almost see right through her.

So what's my point? Well, how about a list?

1. Awards shows are stupid.
2. Actresses are (mostly) too skinny.
3. Some of the dresses are laugh-out-loud funny.
4. I need a new TV. And cable. And to get out more.
5. There is no way to end this post so I will ju

To All the Skinny Girls...

Take that, tall skinny-legged girls...

Who knew that my fat thighs were good for my heart?

RIP, Mary Travers

Mary Travers died yesterday. She was one-third of Peter, Paul and Mary, the folk trio who gained fame in the 60s with protest songs and anthems. I have always favored songs with good lyrics, melodies and harmonies, so I have always loved PP&M.

But a tall, blonde woman and two goatee’d men (all three aging) with two guitars singing of civil rights and protesting a war that is only known in history books do not sell records anymore. You only heard of PP&M when they went on a reunion tour or had a special on PBS. Last year I watched a PBS re-run of one of their ‘reunion’ tours. I sat and sang along, mostly with tears in my eyes. My son saw me and asked, “why are you crying, mommy?”

“Because this song is so beautiful, sweetie.”

“Don’t cry, mommy.”

They were playing Puff, the Magic Dragon. I wasn’t thinking of a dragon but of a battered yellow fish and a pink and green bear, both a bit ragged as the softness has been loved off of them. I looked at my sweet boy and knew that soon these two little stuffed animals will wind up stuffed in a box somewhere just as Jackie Paper’s dragon was. E won’t want to sleep with a bear and a fish anymore and I will lovingly store them in a box somewhere awaiting a time when perhaps my son’s child will need some comfort as he sleeps.

“Yes, my sweet, this song makes mommy cry.”

And it probably always will.



A dragon lives forever, but not so little girls. Rest in peace, indeed, Mary Travers.

Of Fire Ants and Hummingbirds

One thing that I did not miss about living in the southern regions of the country is fire ants. They certainly belong in one of the lower circles of hell. If you have not lived in the south then you have not been introduced to these nasty little devils. These are not the innocuous little black ants of my youth in the northwest. These little mites lay in wait and jump out to lay their torture on unsuspecting bare or sandled feet and ankles.

This is the south, y'all. Sandals are part of the uniform (and no wisecracks about the pedicure or I'm gonna have to hurt you).

Yesterday as I, all unsuspectingly, was retrieving my groceries from my trunk I felt at first a little burning, then more then more. It feels like someone is sticking pins in your feet, little devils. I got four bites in one toe alone. They must have thought it was a smorgasbord.

God I hate them.

Speaking of southern wildlife, there has been a hummingbird snacking on the bottlebrush trees outside my window. I am still trying to get a decent picture of the little guy. I probably shouldn't be calling it a 'guy'. I think it's a female since she isn't all adorned and all.

Anyway, this is the best I have so far.

Here's hoping your day brings more hummingbirds than fire ants.

Quack? Or not...

The day after E was born a nurse called me and said, "Is your little boy going to have a circumcision today?" I informed her that my husband and I had decided against that procedure.

The next morning I got another phone call from the nurse who asked "Is your little boy going to have a circumcision today?" Once again I informed her that we had decided to leave E intact.

Sunday (yes, I spent 3 days in the hospital following a vaginal birth...they were watching my blood pressure and if it hadn't behaved on that day they were going to send E home and keep me!!) I again recevied a call from the nurse asking "Is your little boy going to have a circumcision today?" Sighing and suppressing my urge to scream, "didn't anybody read (or write in) his chart!!!", I told her 'no'.

Yesterday I took E to his pediatrician for his school checkup. He did not see an actual MD. He saw a board certified pediatric nurse practitioner with the same office we went to when we were last in Florida. The reason I am questioning her is that she mentioned 'phimosis' and said I should schedule an appointment with a urologist. She asked me if we have been stretching his foreskin. I said no.

Now I am kind of confused. Everything that I have read says that it is normal for a little boy's foreskin to still not retract at age 6 and not to worry about it. They also say not to manipulate it if it doesn't easily retract. You could hurt him and cause damage. One website said that by age 10, 80% of little boys retract and by 18 it's about 98%. I think age 6 is too early to diagnose phimosis.

My question, dear internets, should I call a urologist and waste a $40 copay or should I listen to the American Academy of Pediatrics, WebMD and Dr. Google and say that this ARNP is a quack? I know that intact little boys in this country are a bit on the rare side but she is board certified. Shouldn't she know this?

Found

The hotel called this morning. They found Freckles still in our room. WTF??!!!! Where in hell was that cat?? We lifted the bed off of its frame and looked under it. I opened the hide-a-bed...THREE TIMES, I lifted the heavy bloody thing up twice. I looked behind the stupid TV. B looked behind the stupid TV. I looked behind the drapes. I looked behind the bloody drapes again. I looked behind the GOD DAMNED drapes AGAIN.

WHERE IN BLOODY HELL WAS THAT STUPID CAT?

He's here now. I guess that is all that matters.

Stupid pets. I just hate them.