You Can't Make This Stuff Up

Okay. Now I think this is funny. Please tell me that I am not the only one. I don't think I would mind having him in the seat next to me. Here are my reasons:

• He wouldn't hog the armrest
• I could steal his airline meal (if they still served these)
• I could steal his peanuts
• I could order extra drinks for him (and then drink them myself)
  
• ...and charge his credit card
• He wouldn't talk to me when I wanted to read/sleep/space out

...seems like the perfect seatmate to me.