Find a New Line of Work...
Seriously.
Stupid criminals such as the guy who wrote his note on his own pay stub. Or the one who showed the teller his ID. And, uh, (seriously this should be obvious), don't log into Facebook from a computer in the house you are in the midst of burgling.
Another tip. Try to find a better disguise than writing on your face. It didn't fool your mother when you were a kid and it ain't fooling anyone now. Oh, and duct tape? Not a good disguise either.
And, please...don't disguise yourself as trees. Talk about something straight from Monty Python (although the fellas probably said to themselves...naaah, this is too crazy even for us...). It was funny on Get Smart, but just really pathetic in real life.
They left something out of the last line of that article:
Manchester cops described the man as a white male, between 45 and 50 years old, wearing glasses and a blue shirt......and foliage.